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Monday, December 31, 2012

2012 In Review

What a year.

In January and February I flatlined with my diet and exercise.  I didn't lose, I didn't gain, I didn't do much of anything at all.  Maybe I coasted a bit.  I did work out with a trainer but didn't really see any gains in weight loss (there were some definite gains in muscle strength.)

In March, we learned my mom was sick.  Stage 4 advanced untreatable inoperable unstoppable lung cancer.  In April I went to Maine and spent the next 7 weeks at my mom's side doing anything I could to love her, help her, and return even 1% of the love she showed me my whole life.

In late May, we lost her.

In June, I moved to Tennessee for a new job.

In July, August, September and October, I speeded through life.  Unpacking, downsizing, jumping into the new and challenging job, doing a ton of physically active things like white water rafting, zip lining, caving, and running a couple of 5K races.  Busy busy busy trying to outrun my mind and heart and when not successful, I ate down my feelings.

In November, my dad came to visit for the Thanksgiving holiday.  That was hard.  The first major holiday without mom.  Somehow the reality of it all knocked me over.  I paused long enough for all the feelings to catch up with me....and it consumed me.

From March to now I have gained considerable weight.  I'm not going to say how much.  There's no need to humiliate myself.  I just want to acknowledge it and refocus on tomorrow and forgive myself for yesterday.  I did what I needed to do and it's time to move forward.

In looking at what worked in 2011 when I was so successful, it was focusing on "The Next Right Choice."  Not worrying about where I had to be in 3 months or 6 months or what day I'd reach a specific weight goal.  Instead, I focused on making good choices now and near-term and let the good consequences come.  And they did.  I tried to plan my food out in advance, but if I found myself in a place without great food options, I'd make the best choice at the moment and get back on track the very next meal.

I was not "all or nothing."  I was all about doing what I could now and if I made a misstep,  acknowledging it and correcting as I moved forward.  Black and white thinking kills someone like me.

Well, now I'm looking forward to 2013.  I want to continue to grow emotionally and spiritually.  I want to continue to shrink physically.  And I want to do it out loud again.  Hiding does not serve me well.  Living out loud suits me just fine, and I feed off the attention (hard to believe, right?)  :-)

So here's to a positive 2013.  Come back along for the ride.  Better yet, toss on some running shoes and let's hit the treadmill together.  Regardless, no more going backwards or standing still.  We're on the move again.



  1. Okay Karly, I'll walk with you on this journey. My Next Right Choices are about strength, energy and mobility. A little weight loss too, but mostly I need to make good choices so my body can fight this arthritis. I also want to make the next right choice so I live authentically. Love you girl!

  2. Forward and onward (push that chair next to you please)!

    Much love and cheering you on!

  3. Carly,

    I make my journey best quietly, but I'll walk this journey with you. You are right, it's all about making the right choices, the lifestyle changes, the rest will fall in place. I've spent the last couple of days reflecting, I've done a lot of laughing, and a lot of crying. We've got a lot more of that to do sister, and you know I'm always here if you need me!

  4. Glad to hear you so positive's been a tough year but you are back on track and sounding great!!!

    Happy New Year to you and your family!!

  5. You have had such a difficult year Carly. I was worried about the holidays for you. I saw you post on the Q right before Thanksgiving and I knew that it would be a rough couple of months for you no matter what. How could it not be without your beloved mom? I am glad to see you writing here again. I love your mad skills and your humor, so you definately have my attention. =)

    (((Big Hugs)))

  6. Good to see you back. I have missed your blog and knew that you would be having a hard time at the moment. Glad to see you are back x

  7. Thanks guys.

    It's super helpful knowing that others care about the same things I do. 2013 is going to rock, yes? Yes! :-)

  8. So happy to have been turned on to your blog! I will gladly join and share this journey with you! I found you from the Q. I have been quit smoking for 48 days now! I am also one week into a class through my insurance company to relearn how to eat correctly in order to lose weight.

    Thank you for sharing your success as well as your fall backs. It helps to know real people and how real things happen. It makes everything seem possible.

    The progress you've made in the last couple of years is amazing and inspiring!

    Thank you!



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